10/17/23

Ep. 3 - It Runneth Over...

Part 1 of 8

Lester’s Toyota Camry is parked outside a house with a “For Sale or Lease” sign. It’s a nice, upscale neighborhood with garage access through the back alley. The 36-year old Lester Luck, sprawled across the back seat of his Toyota Camry, awakens, disturbed by a dogs barking. He redials the last number on his cellphone, a number he’s tried a dozen times before. Still no answer. Lester opens the car door and is about to step out when, “Careful, there’s a pile of it right below your feet.” Lester looks down and spots the huge pile of dog manure just outside his door. “You’re a lifesaver,” Lester thanks as he spies the dog and its owner walking some sixty-feet ahead. “You’re the realtor, right?” the Retired Neighbor asks. “One of them. I was supposed to do work inside early this morning. Couldn’t get in because they gave me the wrong lock box number. And I wasn’t about to make another two hour drive back home.” The Retired Neighbor adds, “His mutt leaves a dump on the sidewalk every damn morning and the owner never cleans it up.” “What’s the association got to say about it?” Lester inquires. “What association!” “Got a shovel?” a plotting Lester asks. “Yeah. What’d you have in mind?” Lester opens his trunk and takes a nine iron out of his golf bag. “Got some freezer bags?” Lester asks the puzzled neighbor. Moments later, Lester is driving plastic bags filled with dog crap into the offending home owner’s front door, each bag exploding on impact! A gathering of a dozen delighted neighbors are applauding his actions. The dog’s owner comes out, just barely ducking the last launch of manure. Lester to the petrified dog owner, “From now on you can either clean it up on the sidewalk or off your house.” Getting the message the lackadaisical dog owner slowly nods assent. Lester’s cellphone rings. “My sincerest apologies, Lester. I’m just now getting up. I passed out early and missed all your calls. Sorry you had to sleep in your car. The right lockbox number is 77826.” “You’re sure?” Lester sternly asks. “Positive. This’ll knock off fifty on what I owe you?” “We’ll split the difference on this one. When you provide the lock box combination in time, so I can get a comfortable night of rest, then it’s fifty,” Lester explains. After getting the key out of the lockbox Lester goes inside. Seconds later he returns to his car, grabs some items out of the trunk and returns back inside to get cleaned up.

Before touching anything inside the vacant yet furnished home, Lester uses his cellphone to take pictures to insure everything will be back in its proper place prior to departure.

Lester is at the end stage of his match with some young hustlers, local street hustlers with loads of disposable cash. The young hustlers increase the bet on the final hole. The desperate move excites their small yet festive entourage. Lester’s long putt wins the round and the outplayed competitors pay off without a single complaint, anxiously begging to play again tomorrow. Among Lester’s threesome is a local sports bookie named Doc Harvey. The young dealers affectionately call him “Poppa Doc” and Harvey correctively reminds them it’s “Doc Harvey.” Doc Harvey runs the biggest sports book in the state. He’s indebted to Lester who once helped him to avenge an embarrassing predicament. Lester clues Doc Harvey in on why they shouldn’t play them again tomorrow, or anytime too soon. “Let them salivate and get more anxious. That way we can take ‘em to school all summer long and help ‘em empty some of those deep pockets!” “These young boys have so much money they just throw it away,” Doc Harvey observes. “Because they’re in a business where they can always get more,” Lester informs, before adding, “Sounds sort of funny hearing this from the biggest book-maker in three states.” Harvey gets an alert on his cellphone. He excuses himself to conduct his business.

As Lester packs his golf bag into the trunk of the Camry he takes a moment to put $20 into a jar he has secluded behind a tool box. He also has a box of business cards in the trunk that include his name, “Lester Luck” and the title “Real Estate Broker.”

Every two weeks Lester makes the three hour trip to Chicago to pay off the ruthless loan sharks to whom his estranged wife owes money. To keep his ex-wife Anica safe Lester is paying Maxey Hex $2,400 bi-weekly. A $400,000 sports car with the license plate “Best EVR” sits in front of the $2.4 million abode. It is here that Lester is first referred to as “The Homeless Golfer. “How’s Anica?” Maxey Hex inquires. “Haven’t seen her in months,” Lester replies. “Of all the SI swimsuit models Anica has always been my favorite, “kingpin Maxey admits.” One of my associates tells me you were on the Pro Tour until you got kicked out for a drug problem.” Lester smiles. “I’ve heard that one too.” “Any truth to it?” Maxey digs “None that I know about,” Lester calmly replies. As Lester is about to leave Maxey interjects, “I bet you regret taking over your wife’s debt.” “Ex-wife,” Lester reminds him, “and you left us little choice.” “Oh, nearly slipped my mind,” Maxey chimes in. “Just like the Federal Reserve, we’ll be increasing the ‘vig’ soon.” Lester pauses a second before continuing on. Being a real asshole, one of Hex’s Lieutenant’s adds, “Let us know if you ever want a private screening of some of her videos. Anica’s a star.” Once safely inside his car Lester smolders.

A graphic-style FLASHBACK details The Homeless Golfer’s early years. 17-year old teen Lester Luck, a natural golfer with a textbook swing and fluid motion, is offered a scholarship to a college he’s never heard of. This is his only offer. The Minnesota farm boy takes the long drive there only to discover Alcorn State University is a HBCU, a History Black College and University. Initially he feels like a piranha on campus.

The athletic dorm where Lester resides creates various nicknames for him, including “The Minnesota Farm Boy,” “Corn-Fed,” “Ultra Bright,” “Cream of Wheat” and “Minnesota.” At the farm boy’s demand, the masses are forced to settle on the endearing nickname Minnesota. Over time, due to his stellar play on the golf course, Lester becomes an accepted and respected fixture on campus.

On the golf course Lester Luck has just one rival, the equally talented Blair Weeks. Blair has the kind of charisma most people envy. He’s particular hard on Lester, always attempting to “one-up” him. The legendary Freddie Banks, an associate coach for the team, takes a deep interest in the two of them.

During the midterm of his freshman year, Lester gets the bad news that his mom, dad and only sibling were killed in a house fire. His teammates rally around him to become his new family, led by the efforts of fellow Phenom Blair Weeks. From that point forward the two become thick as thieves.

Back to the present in Baja Sur, Mexico, Blair Weeks is playing rounds of golf with high-profile Mexican businessmen, Javier Darius and Monster Rick, which results in him taking home more than $11,000 during a three day weekend. Both men are affluent in English and are accompanied by an entourage that includes the sexiest of call girls, caddies and personal bodyguards. It’s no secret these flamboyant entrepreneurs are engaged in both legitimate and the shadiest of business dealings. Monster Rick brags about some of the real estate holdings he and Javier have in their portfolio. “We own 2,300 homes in your southern states. Another fifteen hundred in Illinois, Indiana and Ohio. 6,700 here in our beloved Mexico.” Blair and his playing partner are truly impressed. “Then they can afford to continue to take this beating,” Blair’s playing partner cracks under his breath. During the final round of play cartel enforcers arrive on the course with a mysterious satchel. At first Blair and company assume the satchel contains drugs or dirty money. Their curiosity gets the better of them so they decide to meddle? They are proudly shown a recently severed head. “The last guy who had the audacity to beat us on the golf course!” Monster Rick jokes. Eventually the truth comes out. “It’s a competitor who tried to move into our territory. No worries,” Javier convinces them. Blair and his partner are so shook up they bogey the next two holes before regaining their composure to win the match. After paying up thousands of dollars like it’s nothing the two kingpins extend an invitation to play any time. “There’s nothing we enjoy more than a good game of golf,” Javier confesses. Monster Rick inquires, “What’s your next week look like? There’s a great course in Cabo de Sol.” “I’ve got to drive up to New Jersey for a funeral,” Blair replies. “Jersey, that’s a damn long way,” Monster Rick recalls. “We’ve got a fleet of private jets. Can have you there in no time at all.” “We need to make several stops along the way,” Blair informs them, “Family business.” ”I feel you,” Javier cuts in. “We need to be taking care of some family business ourselves.” Blair realizes their kind of family business is completely different than his.

While Blair is engaged on the course, Chelsea Reyes, his long-time girlfriend, maintains pace in her own golf cart bidding her time by playing video games or posting on social media. Her social media browsing is interrupted by a phone notification. It is a reminder for the upcoming Alcorn State Golf Reunion. The graduating classes will be playing a Scramble against the alumni. The flyer design for this prestigious outing is in itself a work of art.

Once safely in the car and ready to leave, Chelsea asks Blair, “What was in the bag?” “Believe me, “Blair promises, “you don’t wanna know!” “Yes I do,” Chelsea insists.” Some guy’s head!” a still rattled Blair reveals as a FLASHBACK of the event is recounted. Having heard and seen it all, Chelsea’s reaction is rather subtle.

Read the full episode script here.